Testimony

Because clearly this will never be said over the pulpit....

Wed. January 08, 2014

I'd like to bear my testimony, and I have been trying to now, for over a year. Six months ago, I finally figured out that if it was ever going to happen, I was going to have to write it down and read it. And then something would always happen - a sick kid, I forgot to bring what I wrote, etc. And I wouldn't be able to do it. But I have kept trying. I know it's unusual - different - to bear your testimony this way - that there's this idea that to be inspired to bare one's soul is sudden and compelling and unplanned. But I am different. We are all of us different - and different doesn't mean wrong or bad. Different is by design.
I have always loved snow. Probably because my first snowfall wasn't until I was 17. I was a freshman at BYU and I dragged my roommates out of bed at midnight to go play in the snow. I woke my parents up at 2am with a phone call just to tell them all about it. (They still tease me for that, btw.) To me, there is just something so amazing about snow. The most fascinating thing being the uniqueness of each snowflake. No two snowflakes are formed under the exact set of conditions and so all are different from one another. Just like people. Each of us is formedunder unique circumstances, and no two of us are exactly alike. And we are all Beautiful and fascinating and wonderous creations of God. And Different. And that is good. That is how God made it. And Imperfect. Snowflakes are all inperfect - they are never 100% symmetrical. Many are broken in places. Just like us. ANd just by design! I am far from having the answers, but I know this:
God made each of us different. By design. We may run out of ways to make a snowflake, but He does not.
All of us are imperfect. By design. We are supposed to struggle. We are supposed to fail. So if you are - good job! I am too.
Just keep trying. Keep being different. Keep failing. Keep Going! God loves us. He loves you. He loves me. We are His children. And sometimes He has to let go of our hand so we can learn to walk. And sometimes we fall flat on our faces when He does. And He still loves us when we do. No "buts"- He doesn't love us despite our flaws. It isn't "We make mistakes but He still loves us." It's "We make mistakes and He loves us." He loves us with our flaws.
So hurt. Struggle. Fail. And remember you are Always loved.